This is a post I should have made a long time ago.
Ya see, I did this thing for the first time when I was only 22 year old. I did it again when I was 28. I only did it twice, and I wish I’d done it more times, when I could, but it has filled my life with a purpose and a contentment I could only dream of.
What was this wonderful event my life? Why it’s having children of course!
I would have written this post sooner had I realized just how unpopular the idea of having children has gotten with “first world” women. I thought every girl dreamed of having a family!
Just how common it is for White women to NOT want kids became horrifyingly clear to me a few weeks ago. I was in a department store and two delightful, seemingly intelligent and attractive young White women (they were both in their early 20s) were helping me with a purchase. I found myself asking them, as I sometimes do with White women, if they were planning to have children. BOTH girls seemed horrified with the notion. I asked why. One said, she was basically a bad person and would be a bad parent and the other said she wanted to improve the world and kids would hold prevent her from doing that.
Naturally I spent some time talking to them about how faulty their thinking is, especially the latter of the two. I hope they will re-consider but I’ve spent a lot of time in last few weeks mulling it over.
It’s so tragic, how these girls and countless other have been brainwashed to think that they shouldn’t embark on what is the most useful, the most rewarding thing they could do with their life. And they HAVE been brainwashed, just as many of us have been.
Even I, who as a girl had always dreamed of having an unspecified amount of kids but definitely a few (3-5?) had come to the conclusion after having my first child that maybe it would be best to stop there! Thank heavens my mother convinced me that my first child needed a sibling! Thanks mom! I hadn’t even watched as much television as most women my age (I loved to read) and still somehow, the prevailing dogma of the day had permeated my mind.
I don’t know how to convince young girls to have children other than to say that if you don’t, you’ll regret it. My life as an empty nester is so less full and rich than my life as the mother of young children so I cannot imagine what life would be like had I never had them.
And please dear sisters who are too old to have children now or can’t…please do not take this as a slur to you but I MUST impress upon the younger generation how important this is to our race and to them personally!
Children give you a good reason to get out of bed early in the morning. If you must work to survive (because your man can’t quite cover all the bills because of this horrible economy) they give you a reason to suffer through the work day. They give you are good reason to take care of your home, prepare good meals and live a healthy lifestyle. In your old age you have memories with them. They help you celebrate YOUR parents’ milestones. And so much more.
And it should be said that if you’ve been a devoted parent to them, they are more likely to see that you are WELL cared for in the future if you have difficulty caring for yourself. They won’t just trust you to strangers (without at least taking an active role in overseeing the care). Your children(and hopefully THEIR burgeoning families) will actually give a hoot about your welfare. They will come visit you and perhaps even listen to your advice. Won’t that be fun? Do you think some African who you shared your religion with is going to do this for you? What about your 5 million facebook friends? Hmmmm
Guess that’s it. Ladies, if you have children or wish you did or should have, please DO share in the comment about it. It’s okay to share the good, the bad and the ugly too. If you’ve made mistakes with your kids, share that too so we can all learn from you.
Thanks for reading and thanks HR for prodding me to write about this.